Birth myths

Sick of your been-there-done-it pals dining out on their blood-and-guts birth stories? Here’s the real – reassuring – deal on what happens during labour

Myth: Labour always starts with an embarrassing gush of water, usually in the supermarket, or in bed so it ruins the mattress.

Reality: The husband of a friend of mine was so worried about this he made her sleep on a plastic sheet for four weeks before the birth. You’ll be relieved to hear that…

‘By no means all labours start with your waters breaking (in fact, only one in 10 are believed to do so). In most cases, it’s just a slow trickle rather than a gush,’ says M&B expert, Michelle Lyne, a lecturer in midwifery at City University London.

‘When it happens, most women just feel like they’ve wet themselves. You get a gush is when water gets trapped in front of the baby’s head and comes out under a lot of pressure from contractions. But even then, it depends on how much water there is and on the degree of pressure.’

Myth: Labour happens so quickly that it’s a race to make it to the hospital.

Reality: If only that were true! While some births do progress at breakneck speed, most do not. The average first labour is 18-24 hours.

‘Fear of giving birth at home or in the car often brings women in to hospital too soon,’ says Michelle. ‘In most cases the only time you need worry is if you’ve had a previous speedy labour (less than four hours) because there’s a high chance it could happen again.

‘If you feel contractions start, time them, then phone the hospital – they’ll be able to advise you on how soon you should go in.’

Myth: Preparing for birth means shaving your pubic hair and having an enema.

Reality: No it doesn’t! This hasn’t happened since the mid-1980s. Pubic hair used to be shaved because it was thought to be unhygienic, but research found that this was not the case. Likewise, enemas, it was believed, reduced the chance of infection by ensuring the bowels were emptied before labour – but this has not been backed up by any findings.

‘The only time your pubic hair will be shaved now is if you have a caesarean section – and then it’s only partial,’ says Michelle. ‘Enemas or suppositories are not given nowadays either – bowel movements are regarded as normal in labour [see below].’

Myth: You lose control of your bowels in labour so the first thing you push out is a poo...

Reality: It’s true that some women poo in labour – but it’s not anything to worry about. ‘Women sometimes fear having a bowel movement, but it is regarded as normal and won’t faze your midwife at all, who will be completely used to it,’ says Michelle.

Myth: Epidurals make you lose all feeling and can slow down labour.

Reality: No they don’t. ‘Newer types of epidurals deaden the pain without losing sensation so you can still feel when to push,’ says Michelle. ‘It’s very rare now to have such a strong epidural that you can’t feel anything at all.

‘Epidurals don’t necessarily make labour longer, but statistically they do increase your chances of having other interventions, such as forceps and ventouse [see below].’

Myth: Your feet will be in stirrups if you need an assisted delivery.

Reality: Yes, but only for your own comfort and to give medical staff better access to help get your baby out quicker – not to torture or humiliate you!
‘Your feet are put in stirrups to support your hips and make sure they are not under too much strain at the pushing stage,’ says Michelle.

‘They’re only usually used for a ventouse (where a vacuum cap is put on your baby’s head) or forceps (large metal instruments which are used to cradle your baby’s head and pull her out). It’s really to give medical staff better access and to stop you closing your legs at a crucial moment.’

Myth: You can’t eat or drink a thing in labour even if it goes on for days.

Reality: Policies vary on this, but most hospitals will allow you to eat easily digestible snacks and you can have sips of water throughout.

‘You probably won’t be allowed a full meal – then you probably won’t want one. easily digestible carbohydrate snacks like energy bars, isotonic drinks and even cups of tea are fine,’ says Michelle.

‘Eating used to be banned because of the risk of food being regurgitated and inhaled into the lungs [check] if a general anaesthetic had to be administered for a caesarean. But nowadays the majority of caesareans are done with a spinal or epidural block.’

Myth: You’ll lose the plot and start screaming and swearing at your partner.

Reality: There is a point in labour, known as transition, where you may start to feel overwhelmed, and women deal with this in different ways. You may want to shout and scream, but equally you may just go into yourself and want to be left alone. It usually happens at the end of the first stage, before the pushing stage begins.

‘You may start raging against your partner or the world generally and say things like “I want to go home” or “I’m tired”,’ says Michelle. ‘You may be experiencing the most pain at this point and feel very emotional. You’ll need lots of encouragement and support from your partner and midwife.’

Myth: Your vagina will be cut to make it bigger for birth as a matter of course.

Reality: This only happens if your midwife thinks it’s necessary. The procedure is called an episiotomy and it’s a small cut in the perineum (the area between your vagina and your anus) to make the opening of your vagina bigger. It sounds scary but it isn’t – you won’t feel it because you’ll be given a local anaesthetic injection.

‘Episiotomies used to be routine because it was believed that cuts healed better than tears. But research showed this wasn’t true,’ says Michelle. ‘It’s no longer done unless your midwife feels it’s really necessary, most commonly prior to using ventouse or forceps, or in the event of the perineum being too thick and the baby being ready to come out.’

Myth: Forceps are like metal torture instruments and ventouse can give your baby a ‘cone’ head.

Reality: ‘Forceps look like giant salad servers, and ventouse are suction caps. They are shaped like that to protect the baby’s head from trauma during delivery, so they do have a useful purpose,’ says Michelle. ‘Ventouse babies do have a bit of “chignon” shaped head to start with, but the swelling usually goes down in the first two to three days and is nothing to worry about.’

‘I never thought I’d do that’

‘I gripped my partner’s hand so tightly I nearly broke one of his fingers. He had to wrench me off.’

Carolyn Whalley, mum to Sebastian, two

‘I’m usually so polite but I got incredibly stroppy in labour and yelled at my midwife when she asked how I was doing. She just shrugged it off.’

Alice Miles, mum to Katrina, eight months

‘I lost all my inhibitions in both labours and literally howled like a dog when a contraction hit its peak – it made me feel better but scared my partner to death!’

Petra Austin, mum to Sam, four months, and Eleanor, three

‘My modesty went out of the window – I had four different midwives, a consultant and several junior doctors looking up between my legs, and I didn’t care. Normally I wouldn’t even wear a bikini in public.’

Anna Stevenson, mum to Jake, 10 months

‘Because I wasn’t allowed to eat I refused to let my partner eat too – I wouldn’t even let him go out and get a sandwich. It was totally irrational – Mike was nearly fainting with hunger after eight hours.’

Julie Crisp, mum to Alicia, 18 months, and Harry, three

‘I wish I’d known that’

‘First labours can go on for ages and ages. You get pain relief but the exhaustion you feel afterwards is something else. I felt like I’d been run over by a bus.’

Jo Barden, mum to Phoebe, two

‘Your body temperature shoots up and down. At transition my feet were freezing and I could have done with a pair of socks, but by the pushing stage I was burning up and needed a cold flannel on my forehead.’

Helen Harris, mum to Bethany, six months

‘Labour doesn’t hurt all the time – you get time to recover between contractions. I was terrified I’d have a low pain threshold, but I think if I’d known about the “gaps” then I wouldn’t have dreaded it.’

Fiona Robertson, mum to Reuben, 13 months