Everything you need to know about getting out and about with your baby

There’s nothing more precious than the first few fuzzy, glorious days with your new baby. But once the visitors have gone and your partner is back at work, it dawns on you: you can’t stay behind closed doors forever. Trouble is, you’re suddenly responsible for this vulnerable little person and the outside world seems like an intimidating place. 

‘Many new mums struggle with getting themselves and their baby out of the house for the first time,’ says maternity nurse and parenting expert Linda Russell. ‘Home becomes a bubble and anything beyond the front door can seem like an alien world. So it’s totally natural to feel daunted about the idea.’

With a bit of forward planning and the right equipment, trips out are a) possible and b) even enjoyable. So, to ease you across the threshold, here’s the Mother & Baby expert guide to how to cope – and thrive – with a baby in tow.

First journeys  – demystified

The trip home from hospital

Bringing your baby out of the cocoon of the maternity ward is exciting but nerve-wracking. After all, you’re saying goodbye to the midwives and now you’re on your own. ‘The thought of taking responsibility for the new arrival is, frankly, terrifying, says parenting expert Linda Russell. ‘But go easy on yourself, stay calm and have the confidence that all will be well.’ Babies are actually remarkably resilient, so try not to get stressed.

First things first: you need a ‘carriage’ for your baby. According to Chris Beely, technical expert from Mamas & Papas, it’s against the law to transport a child in a private vehicle without an ‘appropriate restraint’. In fact, most hospitals won’t let you drive your newborn home without a car seat, says Chris. So if you are driving, make sure you have a car seat and you – and your other half – have had a good practice at installing it. Ideally this should take place before the baby is born. (See p77 for more information.) ‘It’s a good idea for the parent who isn’t driving to sit in the back with the baby,’ says Chris. ‘The parent who is should keep their eyes on the road and concentrate on safety.’

Your first time out of the front door

Why leave the house at all, you may think. After all, everyone seems keen to visit you. But the grandparents will go home and your partner will return to work. If you want some fresh air and sanity (not to mention a pint of milk), it’s time to hit the streets. This can be scary but the trick is to take it slowly and keep it simple. So when should you take your baby out for the first time? ‘There are no hard-and-fast rules,’ says maternity nurse Ali Durban. ‘Depending on how your birth went and whether the baby was premature, the answer is when you feel ready.’

It is fine to go for short walks with your newborn immediately; just dress her with enough layers to keep her warm or a sun hat if it’s a hot day. Start by walking round the block then increase your time outdoors as you feel more confident. If you are anxious take your partner, mum or friend for support. It’s also a good way to get some gentle postnatal exercise.

The first time behind the wheel

For the first few car trips, someone else will probably be driving (especially if you’ve had a c-section), leaving you free to gaze at your baby. But that first drive alone is a huge milestone. How will you concentrate on the road when you’re listening out for every squawk and whimper? Just like the first walk round the block, the trick is to start gently and give yourself time to build your confidence. Treat driving your baby like your first road trips after passing your driving test.

‘Don’t make your first journey a long-distance one,’ says Chris. Stick to a short, familiar route somewhere local, where there are no juggernauts shuddering through. And choose a day when you aren’t pushed for time.

Taking public transport

‘If you use public transport regularly, you’ll need to consider that when choosing which pram or buggy to buy,’ says Linda Russell. ‘Sometimes, the most fashionable or expensive pushchairs are the hardest to collapse quickly. And if you’re travelling on a bus in the rush hour you’ll probably have to take the baby out and hold her while attempting to fold the buggy with the other hand.’ On most uncrowded buses there is space for up to three buggies, but the space is earmarked for wheelchair users too, and they take priority. Also be aware that this policy may vary with different bus companies. If you can’t avoid travelling during the rush hour, think about using a sling rather than a buggy.

When you have to negotiate station steps and getting on and off train carriages, be assertive about asking for help. ‘Look for a friendly face and ask if they would mind giving you a hand,’ says Linda. ‘People are often happy to assist but aren’t always confident enough to offer.’

London Underground users should visit its website, tfl.gov.uk, for a guide to which stations are easy to access with a buggy. Everything is much simpler if you plan ahead. Again, if you avoid the rush hour and ask for help on escalators and stairs, travelling can be much more baby-friendly than you’d probably imagine. 

Baby Etiquette in public places

‘There’s a fine line between exercising your right to take your newborn into the world and disturbing other people,’ says Linda. ‘Try to remember how you felt about babies before you had one of your own.’ Your friend’s super-chic wedding ceremony may not be the best time to smile indulgently while your baby screams the place down.

So choose where to go wisely. Websites are great places to find out about pubs, restaurants and cafés that actively welcome families. If there are other parents around, your screaming newborn is more likely to attract sympathy than irritation.

‘If you’re going out with your partner, take it in turns so one of you eats or goes to the loo while the other amuses the baby,’ says Linda.

Feeding your baby when you’re out

If you’re a bottle-feeding mum, feeding is straightforward just ensure bottles stay sterile by keeping their lids on. You can chill a feed at home, carry it in an insulated cool bag and reheat it in a cup of hot water. Many shops also sell cartons of ready-made baby milk and pre-sterilised bottles which, although expensive, are useful in emergencies.

For many breastfeeding mums, the first time they feed their baby in public is a big deal. ‘Wait until feeding is well established before attempting it,’ says Linda. ‘If you’re struggling to get your newborn to latch on, contact your local National Childbirth Trust breastfeeding counsellor (0300 330 0771) for advice. Practise various feeding positions at home, so you’re used to sitting upright rather than, say, lying down.’

Then try breastfeeding in front of friends and family at home so you’ve already done it ‘in public’. If you go into a café, explain the situation and ask the waitress for a quiet table. By law, you are entitled to breastfeed your newborn outside and in all public places, which includes cafés, restaurants and libraries.

‘It is possible to breastfeed discreetly – use a scarf or shawl to cover up,’ says Linda. ‘Another great accessory is a breastfeeding tummy band, which fits around your middle. It will allow you to lift up a T-shirt or top without exposing your belly. Finally, there is strength in numbers: why not arrange to meet other breastfeeding friends for a coffee?’

Many large shops, such as Boots, John Lewis, Mamas & Papas and Marks & Spencer, have breastfeeding areas in their mother and baby rooms. Most large shopping centres also have a breastfeeding area (which is, of course, also open to bottle-feeding mums in search of peace and quiet). To find breastfeeding-friendly venues in your area check the breastfeeding friendly places guide.