Being a mum with glaucoma

Despite having just five per cent vision, Lynsey is prepared for the arrival of her second baby

‘I love being a mum. My daughter, Nakomi, is now nine, and I’ve always wanted more children – I was even accepted as a foster carer. But then, due to acute glaucoma, I lost my sight.

 ‘Three years ago when Nakomi and I went for routine eye tests, the optician asked whether I got many headaches. I’d had migraines, which I’d put down to juggling life as a single mum with work as a shop assistant, and the stress of recently losing my mum. I was shocked when she suggested I went to the eye hospital for more tests.

 ‘The tests revealed I’d lost the sight in my left eye without even realising – apparently, it happened so quickly, my right eye had compensated for the loss so I hadn’t noticed.  “You have acute glaucoma,” the doctor explained. “The damage to your left eye is irreparable, and you’ll need to be attached to a drip immediately to save the vision in your right.” The optic nerve had been squeezed too tight and died. I couldn’t take it in; how had it happened?

 ‘I was told that there are no definite causes and a few days later, despite attempts to save the sight in my right eye, I woke up blind. It was the scariest moment of my life.

 ‘A friend helped me to hospital and the doctors managed to save ten per cent of my sight, which has now fallen to five, and I was registered blind. I felt my life was over.

 ‘I had to give up my job which I loved, and my horse riding, Thai boxing and dancing. My self-esteem plummeted. But somehow I got through it – I had to, for Nakomi’s sake. 

‘A mobility officer was supposed to help me with everyday tasks, but there weren’t enough, so I had to teach myself. I coped by making games out of needing Nakomi’s help, but she had to grow up fast. Luckily for me she’s taken everything in her stride. I taught myself to use a white stick so I could still go out, though I hate feeling people staring (I can’t see them, but I know they do).

 ‘A year later, I met my partner, Stuart, on the Internet, which I use with special speech software. Within 18 months we’d moved in together and decided my blindness wouldn’t stop us starting our own family – I’d coped as a single mum to Nakomi after all.

‘I’m now 12 weeks pregnant and so excited. The sonographer enlarged my scan last week so I could just make out the baby, which was amazing, but my biggest fear is not being able to see who the baby looks like when it’s born. I’m not scared of giving birth again, or coping with a newborn, because of the amazing support I have from Stuart. I’m more worried about the toddler years.

 ‘My pregnancy means I’ve had to come off my medication so I may lose the little vision I do have. I’m learning brail just in case – but it’s hard. I’m just trying to take each new obstacle as it comes. It’s going to be hard, but I’m ready for it.’

 ‘Most importantly, I don’t want people to pity me. I want them to feel proud that I’ve been able to achieve so much. With the help and support of Stuart, I know I’ll make a fantastic mum to our new baby.’

Lynsey Irving, 29, lives in South Yorkshire with her partner Stuart Rowe, 29, and daughter Nakomi-Jordanna, nine, and is 12 weeks pregnant.

Glaucoma – The Facts

• Glaucoma is caused when eye drainage becomes blocked and pressure builds in the eye. If untreated, this results in loss of sight, for which there’s no cure.
• It is more common in people over 50, and diabetics,
• For more info on glaucoma visit glaucoma-association.com.
• Lynsey has found the help of Henshaws Society invaluable. Visit henshaws.org.uk for more info.