Kirsty's blog: School makes us sick

Ever since Carmel started nursery we have been ill.  Carmel had one terrible bout of illness involving high temperature, cough and a very scary rash that turned into eczema, something she has never suffered with before and now she seems to get one cold after another. 

I too have gone from one horrible set of symptoms to another and just as I get better, Carmel comes home from nursery, sniffs or sneezes and I’m ill again too.  Our immune systems seem to have collapsed and I’ve no idea when it will end.  We seem to spend at least one day of each week lying on the couch drifting in and out of sleep.

Nursery has been bad (on a few levels) for us.  We didn’t get into any of the nurseries we applied for when Carmel was around 2 years old as this area of London is very over subscribed for all school places.  When I was working it seemed like the best idea to sign her up for an independent nursery school place, which means we have to pay on top of the government grant for free places.  Sadly I then lost my job and our world was turned upside down. 

Now we are committed to the place we are in until Easter but we cannot find anywhere to move to for Easter as our borough only have January and September entry for new starters.  So, we now have the promise of a place next September where we won’t have to pay extra but Carmel will then be moved again for primary school in January.  I feel terrible, like I’ve really let her down. 

Carmel still hasn’t really taken to nursery anyway, what with all the time off for illness, we seem to be resettling her every couple of weeks.  She still cries every time it’s a ‘school day’ and is loathe to let us out of her sight at dropping off time. 

I am in real turmoil, we are paying for a place that isn’t used fully and she seems to hate it.  I’m not working so I am actually able to have her at home, even though I want that time to look for work and just to get breathing space for chores etc. 

I am ill again this week, my throat infection and temperature have returned even after a course of antibiotics and I’m just thinking that maybe we’d all be happier (and richer) if Carmel left nursery for now.  Then I think she’ll be left behind all the other kids and that she isn’t lined up for any decent primary schools yet either so I could be ruining her future education.

I am so shocked at the pressure and stress involved in decisions on schooling. I never imagined that her education was going to wreck my health and confidence. I really don’t have a clue where to start and I’ve just missed the open days at the local primary schools because I was too ill to attend.  I just hope that this, like all the sleepless nights and stinking nappies at the newborn baby stage, will be forgotten in the not too distant future.