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Mother & Baby
DON'T... let her cope with morning sickness on her own.
Getting out of bed to hold her hair back and rub her back while she barfs for Britain may not be your idea of fun, but consider how much worse she's feeling. If she doesn't want you around, make yourself useful by conjuring up some tea and toast for when she's feeling better. >> Does pregnancy mean wedding bells?DO... discover massage.
Not only will it relieve your partner's aches and pains, it's also wonderfully relaxing. You could take a massage course, but as long as you ensure you have warm hands, some pregnancy friendly oil and use gentle strokes, you can't really go wrong. Be guided by her reactions and take her falling asleep as the ultimate accolade to your skills.DON'T... say 'You're looking rough darling', even if she is. >> Pregnancy sex for every mood swingPregnacy can make some women feel exhausted and washed out, especially in the first trimester. She'll know how she looks, you pointing it out will not be considered supportive (unless you follw up with 'So I've booked you into a five-star spa for a week...'). DO... give up your vices.
If you smoke, stop. Secondary smoke is harmful to babies and you can't get a better incentive to kick the habit than the health of your baby. Your partner also needs to eat healthily now that she's pregnant, so consign those takeaway menu's to the back of the kitchen drawer and buy a couple of cook books with the money you'll save. >> Dealing with your emotions during pregnancyDON'T... assume that the housework fairies are going to visit your home on a daily basis.
She may be too tired to plug in the vacuum cleaner, but that doesn't mean she'll be happy living with a colony of dust bunnies for the next nine months (even if you are). Be pro-active and get stuck into the housework, or hire a cleaner.
DO... something to make her happy ever day.
Growing a baby is hard work, both physically and emotonally. Little things like running her a bath, cooking dinner and buying her flowers can make all the difference when she's had a tough day.
DON'T... miss out on the opportunity to read up about pregnancy.
You're both on this exciting journey together and you don't want to have to ask someone else for directions now, do you? She'll be looking to you for support, and knowing what she's going through will help you to feel involved and useful.
DO... accept that there will be times when your usually lovely partner morphs into a being from Planet Stroppy.
Mood swings are part of the deal and are caused by pregnancy hormones, so try to be understanding and bite your tongue. You won't be the first man who finds himself assembling a flat pack cot at 11pm to keep the peace.
DON'T... tune out if she wants to have a moan.
Yes, the footy might be on and it may be far more interesting than listening to her complain about being fat when you think she looks gorgeous, but when it comes to a competition between 11 burly men and the mother of yor child needing reassurance when she's feeling vulnerable, you know who really deserves your undivided attention.>> How men feel during pregnancyDO... get over your horror of shopping.
Buying for your baby is a great way to feel like you're actually contributing something meaningful, rather than standing on the sidelines cheering your partner on. And you get the chance to impress friends and family with your technical knowledge of car seats and push chairs.
DON'T... miss out on scans and antenatal classes.
Antenatal classes will give you an idea of what to expect at the birth and seeing your baby on a scan will be the best connection you have with it until it's born. Strong men have been known to go weak at the knees at the sight of their unborn babies, and no meeting or deadline is worth more than that.
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