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By aajmaness
11 November 2008 23:51
I am almost 29, married 3.5 years. With him 10.5. He told me when he got this one job, that we could start having kids. After 6 months of waiting, he got the job. We are financially stable and have a home, so no worries there, but I am afraid that even though he said before he got this one job that we could start trying afterward that he really didn't mean it. Any advice? I'm really ready and am afraid of him saying we have to wait for some other "future time line event of his choice"...
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How can I talk to my husband about starting a family?
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pink11 says
To be honest, if I couldn't just come out and say it to my husband, I'd be worried about how close we really were..... not sure about all this "set the mood stuff", you should just be able to talk about it openly, whenever and wherever. You should be able to talk about anything with your husband without worrying about scaring him off - he isn't some casual date that you've only seen a couple of times, he did marry you! I would just say it and if he's scared or makes excuses, I would tell him to grow up!! Obviously you can't force someone to want a baby but he ought to be able to at least be honest about it with you and not just try to dodge the issue.
To be honest, if I couldn't just come out and say it to my husband, I'd be worried about how close we really were..... not sure about all this "set the mood stuff", you should just be able to talk about it openly, whenever and wherever.
You should be able to talk about anything with your husband without worrying about scaring him off - he isn't some casual date that you've only seen a couple of times, he did marry you!
I would just say it and if he's scared or makes excuses, I would tell him to grow up!! Obviously you can't force someone to want a baby but he ought to be able to at least be honest about it with you and not just try to dodge the issue.
08 July 2009 09:39
Earth Mumma says
Go out to a pub or a restaurant - somewhere where you will have to keep your emotions in check and yourselves under control and talk to him about this - my husband really needed persuading and I gave him a deadline when he needed to give me his answer by. Luckily for me he said yes - he has never looked backand idolises our son but getting him to agree was tricky. He could be scared of the responsibility - make him feel good about himself and talk aout the practicalities - ask questions first about why he feels like this.
22 April 2009 07:23
cmorris088 says
I would first of all set the scene/mood to have this talk. A lovely home cooked meal, with candles, soft music lots of wine... but before the wine flows too freely,I would bring up the subject of starting a family, now that he has his 'dream job'. Don't get put off with 'the time is not right' view, as the timing is never right. If we were to wait to have kids when the time is right, most of us would never have them, as something always comes up... lack of money,ill health, job, or an unexpected bill, sometimes you have to just bite the bullet and go for it if you are both up for it. Remember, it is something which you both need to agree on, as he may resent the fact if you got pregnant deliberately without his initial agreement. Try not to argue a point, but leave it where you both think on this a bit more and think about all the fun trying........
04 January 2009 21:44
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